Spillin’ The Tea With Kee: The Advice Column (January 30, 2020)


Dear Kee:

I am a recent graduate (2018) of an HBCU in Mississippi. While there I loved every minute of it. I made great friends (at least I thought) and I learned my craft. I have been working at a Fortune 500 company for the past two years and the position that I’m in is quite rewarding. About 6 months ago my ‘friend’ from college began working at the company where I’m employed. We would go out for lunch, attend meetings together, and converse frequently. Recently there was a job opening within the company that would have made me an assistant manager making a six figure salary. I confided in my ‘friend’ how much I wanted this job and would be willing to work overtime to get it. Unbeknownst to me, my ‘friend’ applied for the same position and began a smear campaign around the office besmirching my name. Sufficed to say, I didn’t get the position but my ‘friend’ did. Now she’s my boss and it is tearing me apart every day that I see her knowing how she betrayed me. The sad part about it is she still wants to hang out and act as though we’re friends. Kee, what should I do here? I mean should I play the role and act as though everything is fine or should I risk being fired (I could always get another job) and confront her about her scrupulous behavior?

Friends: How Many Of Us Have Them?

Dear Friends: How Many Of Us Have Them?

I can honestly see why you’re furious. I mean, there’s no way you could have known your ‘friend’ would betray you in this way. Although, you kind of brought this upon yourself. You were completely blindsided by her mischievous behavior, but you should know, everyone does not want to see you succeed and she was one of those people. You have to be careful of who you tell your goals and plans to because jealousy plays a big role, especially in the workplace. Your ‘friend’ knew you had the talent and experience for this job but she wanted to shine in your spotlight and you simply let her. Now, there’s nothing you can really do because the position is taken. I understand why you would want to get even with her or risk your job, but you can’t. You still have a life to live even after this matter and there’s bills to be paid. My advice to you is to be the mature one and let it go. You’re an adult now so you can’t risk your career on something so petty. Besides, everything happens for a reason. Maybe this wasn’t the job for you and an even higher position is coming for you in the future. Also, just respectfully let her know that you would like to keep the relationship completely professional from now on. Additionally, when it comes to people throwing dirt on your name or belittling you, you must be doing something right. She needed some kind of ammunition to take you down. Don’t worry because you know who you are and you know your abilities. I promise you that your time will come. Just be careful when it comes to letting people know your next move. Good Luck.