Dear O:
Love your column. Here’s my predicament. My boyfriend went through my phone while I was in the shower and saw that I was texting some of his friends. Do you think I should play stupid or confess to what I did? I really do love him, but his friends have more money than he has and I’m tired of being around a man who doesn’t have money and can’t provide. Help me out O, what should I do?
Sincerely,
Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place
Dear Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place:
You both are extremely wrong in more ways than one. I want you to first understand that when you are in a relationship with someone you should be with them for who they are and not what they have. If you love him as you say you do, his inability to provide for you at this time shouldn’t play such a huge factor in the situation that you cheat and talk to his friends. Ask yourself, “Is he trying?”
On the other hand, he shouldn’t have gone through your phone. Another part of being in a healthy relationship is being able to trust one another. If he did have suspicions about what was in your phone whether he thought you would tell the truth or not, he should have asked.
Lastly, you should tell the truth. Nothing good comes from lying and it’s a hole that gets deeper and deeper because you have to keep your lie buried. Show integrity, but most importantly, leave if you aren’t satisfied instead of talking to other people especially if you really love him.
Supportive,
O