Dear Sista Girl:
I have, what would seem to be a HUGE problem. Over the Summer I was working at an organization (I won’t name the organization due to legal ramifications) and I met Shayla (not her real name) who was 15 years my Senior (I’m 21). We were colleagues, then friends, then something much more intimate. As the Summer ended, I told her that I was returning to college to complete my Senior year. As I was leaving, Shayla told me that she was madly in love with me and that she didn’t want me to leave. She even insisted that she’d take care of me if I stayed. Now Sista Girl I like Shayla, I really do, but not like that. I neglected to mention that Shayla is married with 3 children. I am definitely not ready for this type of relationship and I really don’t want to hurt her feelings but she’s leaving me no choice. Sista Girl help me please. How can I permanently end our relationship without hurting Shayla’s feelings. I mean I don’t want to hurt her husband and kids by having them find out about our entanglement. Please help me!
Signed,
Entangled
Dear Entangled:
It sounds like you’re in a difficult situation. The best way to handle this is with honesty and kindness. Let Shayla know that while you care about her, you don’t feel the same way she does. It’s important to be clear that the relationship can’t continue, especially since she’s married and has children. You can tell her that it’s best for both of you to end things now to avoid causing any more pain in the future. It might hurt her feelings, but it’s the right thing to do for both of you. Ending things now is the most respectful way to move forward.
Peace & Love,
Sista Girl
