Spillin’ The Tea With Kee: The Advice Column (February 14, 2020)

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Dear Kee:
     I’m a 20-year-old Junior here at the illustrious Alcorn State University and I have somewhat of a problem. I don’t know what to do. I’ll just jump right into it. My friend Tai (not her real name) and I have been friends since Freshman year. She’s like a sister to me and I trust her with my life. Last Fall, August to be exact, I met a young man who I consider to be my soul mate. He’s intelligent, kind, God-fearing, ambitious, and a real renaissance man. We’ve been dating for six months and I know he’s the man that I’m going to marry one day. But here’s my problem, Grant (not his real name) and Tai are a little too close for me. For instance, Grant and I go to a lot of events on campus and a lot of the time Tai is with us. She’s a very kindhearted person by nature but lately she’s been showing a lot of public displays of affection towards Grant such as hugging him exceptionally too long, giving him massages, staying up late nights playing video games with him, calling him her ‘Boo’ and she even kissed him on the cheek in front of the library one day. I don’t know how to feel about this. I know Tai wants the best for me and maybe she’s happy about my man because I’m happy about him but it’s getting uncomfortable to be around the both of them. Should I say something to them or should I just be happy that my best friend and my man are getting along?
Signed,
Pulled In Too Many Directions

Dear Pulled In Too Many Directions:

Honestly, I can’t believe you haven’t said anything to them prior to this. What decent woman lets her girlfriend be this comfortable with her boyfriend? I just cannot see that happening. I’m just going to be straight forward with you and say you need to check both of them on this disgusting behavior. There’s no way they should be doing this type of thing in front of you. I mean, do they even have any respect for you and your feelings? Do you have any respect for yourself? If you’re worth something to either of them, they would have sense enough to know that this behavior is wrong. I don’t know what their intentions are and maybe they think it’s okay, but anybody could see they have some type of fling going on that needs to be confronted and I can’t express this enough. If you want your man, you need to take action and put your ‘so- called friend’ in her place. If she’s like a sister to you, she should have no problem backing off. If the tables were turned, I promise she would have a problem with it as well. You’re just simply standing by, in denial about it all. Do something now, before your boyfriend and your friend are in a relationship behind your back.