Can men and women just be friends? This is a controversial topic that has been argued for years. I believe there is no straightforward answer which makes it even more contentious. All men and women do not think the same, act the same, or do the same things but I do feel as humans there are a few things we all possess. Every human battles temptation often especially depending on the circumstances. This leads me to say men and women can and can not just be friends, it all depends on the people and the situation.
There are some people who start to be friends with a person just for the sole purpose of becoming something more. There are some people who start to be friends with a person just because they like their energy, personality, and merely who they are as a whole. However, I feel that even if you do become friends with someone just to be their friend it puts you on a perfect pedestal to become something more. Especially the friends that are extremely close, they probably are more tempted then the occasional, distant friends.
When you really think about it, being just friends is similar to dating just without the romantic benefits. For example, in both relationships and friendships you communicate, trust, argue, laugh, hang out, take trips, meet their families, etc. The only thing you miss out on is the sexual additions and relationship title. A lot of people say being best friends and taking it to the next level can either be the best thing that has ever happened to you or you ruined a perfectly good friendship. According to www.scientificamerican.com, “Males were significantly more likely than females to list romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships, and this discrepancy increased as men aged…” After the few things I’ve learned growing up, I can understand why this study turned out this way. As I got older I was always told “most boys will only want you for one thing and one thing only.” This made me look at men in a different way and really study how they acted. Now I can say, most of my friends are guys, however, with this being said, I know for a fact they have looked or thought about me in more than just a friendly way. As I mentioned above, a friendship is so similar to a relationship that if they have looked at me as more than a friend what’s stopping them from taking that next step. I think that although the men tested higher for having a romantic attraction, women can be just as enticed and have a romantic attraction as well.
All things considered, that is just looking at it from one perspective without considering what I mentioned at the beginning. All men and women are different. There is a possibility you can have a friend of the opposite sex who has no interest in you other than being your friend. Every single human and friendship does not have to have an ulterior motive within them. Above is more of popular worldly superstition not a fact for every person or relationship. According towww.artofmanliness.com, “So, can men and women be friends? Sure. With caveats.” I agree completely with this. There have to be restrictions in order for the friendship to work. For instance, normally in female friendships we’ll change clothes in front of each other, talk about feminine things, etc. In front of a male, you probably could not do those things because they’d be tempted to think non-platonic thoughts. Without restrictions you leave a lot of grey area for certain things to happen.
You can not judge every man and woman and say they can not be in a strict friend relationship. However, do not neglect the signs if you can tell they’re your friend for one purpose only. You can not control their thoughts but you can make it clear in the beginning that nothing will happen. A platonic relationship may truly not be what’s best for you and your “friend”. For all you know they may be the person you are destined to marry.
